RIP Neil Armstrong .. Yes .. But RIP Brains

While August 25th 2013 marked the first death anniversary of Neil Armstrong, the original moon-walker, one stupid news bit by ABC News has made the whole world think that he died on 27th August 2013 , flooding twitter with RIP Neil Armstrong tweets. Clearly , ABC News is their India TV. One minute silence for these people and many others who chose to go with the majority while ignoring the power of their brains to verify the mass opinion.

Review: The Most Ridiculous Phone Call In The History Of Mankind

First watch the video to know what I am gonna talk about.

I don't understand why did he slam the receiver like that. The demand was being put across in a very polite manner where in our polite robber who first cared enough to call the Manager to confirm if he supplies money for necessities. 10 points to the polite robber for not disclosing his name and address when he was asked to tell the important thing. The polite robber was trying to explain the motive behind his demand ... it was necessity of money , why else will anyone ask for money ? When we were kid we used to ask money from our parents because we wanted to buy something, or to give treat to our friends etc.. we had a necessity!! When the polite robber realized that the manager is not prepared to give the money, he went even higher on the scale of human kindness by asking if the manager actually has the money or not. I mean who does that? To this the manager replies 'Bloody'. How rude is that. It's sad that the conversation didn't end on a happy note. If the manager had clearly told him that he doesn't have the money, I'm sure the polite robber would have called someone else, but this is no way to treat someone. I strongly condemn this video.

Carl Sagan's Influence on Neil deGrasse Tyson

This video actually made me cry. Watch this very short video but the amount of impact it makes on your mind is huge. These are great people, and when they speak , you know what intelligence is. Imagine if everyone in the world is intelligent, unique, open minded and compassionate. People like Neil deGrasse Tyson , Michio Kaku, RP Feynmann, Carl Sagan, Bill Nye have raised the hopes for humanity and a better tomorrow by spreading the word of Science and rational approach as a new medium to think and act. Imagine where the world would be if every one starts thinking like them, in their own unique way.

When do we become conscious?

Everybody knows about consciousness. It's what we are, it's our soul, it's beyond our physical body and even the brain. We are merely the medium for brain to function and perform its action. Brain is its own being. So we can say that our consciousness is our brain's brain. Consciousness is that little voice in your head in which you are reading this text. It's always there, talking to you, thinking for you and even telling you what to do in split seconds before falling or accidents. Consciousness is the sense of good or bad even when experiencing a thing or feeling for the first time.

In an actual experiment to find out when does consciousness kicks in a newborn baby's brain, a newborn baby was made to smell milk first and then acetone. In former case of milk, the blood flow in baby's brain increased, showing more activity in vortex of his brain, whereas when he was made to smell acetone, the foul smell of the chemical reduced the blood flow in his brain. This means the new born baby has a sense of good and bad even before he opened his eyes and saw anything around him, even his own mother!

No other animal has consciousness, and only consciousness makes us human. Make good use of it.

The bigger question is what entity injected consciousness in humans and why not in any other creature on earth.

Sans Movie Watching Sense

So I went for a movie with my sister today .The interiors of the theater were beautiful. It was a huge hall , hence more people so obviously it meant more idiots inside the hall and hence more disturbance during the movie. I was just hoping no idiot should be sitting close to us to disturb.

Well the movie began ( The Conjuring) . People were laughing , hooting and making funny noises during the scary scenes. Needless to say it was getting on my nerves and I was getting frustrated that people pay 150rs. to come and shout throughout the movie and disturb others instead of enjoying the movie. To make it worse, 3 guys sitting to my right also started making noises, clapping , laughing and talking unnecessarily. I managed to ignore them for sometime but their disturbance was increasing. When I could not take it anymore I politely asked the guy on my right " Can you please not make the noises? its disturbing us". To my surprise, instead of understanding what I said, he replied " This is not the way to talk, first you ask everyone in the hall to keep quiet and then you tell us . We also came to enjoy". This came in his broken english and I asked him to keep his voice low but I realized that he is not worth talking to . Moreover, his friends started asking that if there is any trouble and they were getting into attack mode ( because friendship!) . So I decided to keep quiet after that.

Although their disturbance reduced after that, but it surprises me that people don't have the basic sense of keeping their phones on silent mode or to walkout to talk if there is an urgent call. But they choose to keep it in loud mode so that when they get a call, not just him, every one should hear the OM JAI JAI ringtone and after 40 seconds when he picks up the call, he doesn't even walk out and finishes his long conversation inside the hall. Why do such people even exist ? They make me hate people.

I am not saying don't laugh when there is a funny scene, but don't laugh when the whole hall is silently watching and enjoying the movie . If you can , please share this so that this message goes out to people who lack movie watching etiquettes.

Digitals

This was my attempt at photoshop long back. I don't do this anymore.

Original Jokes/Memes Part-3!!!

Why did the tall guy could not open the bra of his tall girlfriend?



Because high hook high hook high high...
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What do you get when you keep few samosas on a carrom board? Carrom carrom samose
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Wasn't Vihar Carol Bag Cannot Plays Das Jan Pat We wake an and marg Ma hip all poor DLF Suck it Tea Luck Nagar

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Tata Nano kitne rupaye me milegi ?

Ek Lakme

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Mujhe chhod doh.... mere hall pe ..

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What did the pencil say to the eraser? Tujhme.. rub dikhta hai yaara mai kya karun...
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Just for fun, name your female dog as 'Haraam' so that when she gives birth to puppies, they will be known as HARAAM K PILLEY. 
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Spotted somewhere in Chennai, who is thirsty now?

Sorry Shaktimaan!

Do you think it will work guys?

Sophisticated cat :

Ain't no twitter bot going trolling me without me trolling it back:

Original Memes & Jokes- Part 2

Earlier post on original memes had gone way too long so here is the second part for it.

Some Success Kid memes:

Yo hipster snake:

This is how you make a science joke even better, who says science nerds are not funny??:

How I feel one day without internet:

Because using % symbol while typing is too mainstream

Facebook faggots

 So got a call from Spicejet ke mausaji

Whenever I think about my ex: 

Special skills spotted on LinkedIn:

This guy was on fire!!

I trolled Myntra.com :

Just the first tweet and he likes to play twitter contests already:

We had a nice time together:

This is how media confuses us!

A meme on riding:

How I feel when she says " I like you only as a friend"

Steps to break up :

 Funny sms I got:

Coincidentally this ad was posted from Gurgaon, horrible people!

F1 trolled India:

On that note: 

I believe I can fly:

NatGeo you ass:

And the guy thought, shayad 4 din baad ladki pat jaye?:

Emails I get

My official email id is given on the company website for a specific purpose but I get emails from people for all kind of work. Some of them are funny and hence sharing those here. Will keep udpating.

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Subject: problems in bullet

SIR,I'M MADAN GOPAL FROM VILL. HAIDEROWAL P.O PIPLANWALA DISTT.HOSHIARPUR.I PURCHASE NEW ROYAL ENFIELD BULLET BIKE LAGWAL DEALER HOSHIARPUR.MY BULLET'S PROBLEMS CAIM PROBLEM.PLEASE SOUTION FOR MY PROBLEMS

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To: Rahul Shankhwar
Subject: Factory Visit

Dear Sir,

i have visited RE factory for getting knowlege in automobile segment(Yaar if you have visited then why are you writing this mail?) . i also a owner of RE Bullet electra 350cc & i am crazy to see a new bullet in a factory . i have a mechanical student 3year at( Mubarak ho , aap baap ban gaye!)  nricem colge in gwl M.P & My classmates are also visiting with me in RE factory so please appoint for visiting sir
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To: Rahul Shankhwar
Subject: NEW SHOWROOM OPEN

Dear, sir
my name is ankit kumar to a new showroom open for a ROYAL ENFIELD to check the location and a permission to new showroom open delhi .
my cell no
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To: Rahul Shankhwar
Subject: asking permission to undergo implant training

we are studying BE.mechanical engineering in arunai engineering college ,thiruvannamalai. we are lover royal enfield (road king )from childwood(wow,they seem to be suffering from the rare disease of erection in childhood).please gave an opportunity to undergo implant training 

( Roadking is not even a Royal Enfield motorcycle)

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To: Rahul Shankhwar
Subject: Re: Job Related

Dear sir,

                Please find attached copy of my resume.kindly help sir i update some time your website(how the fuck he got access to update our website!!)  but not responding till date(sorry bro the website doesn't respond until you feed it a burger)   please move to HR ( no thanks I am fine in marketing)

Thanks
95666xxxxx(That's your name? What an idea sir g!)

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Now I had put up an ad to sell my motorcycle, but this guy seems to be more interested in buying me

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Well.. Ladies

Kuch Nai

What will you have ?
Kuch nai yaar
Ok